Changes to Skype Shows

After a lot of thought I’ve decided to change my rates & structure for how I do Skype shows. First of all, my rates for all shows are now $5 per minute. However I have also decided that I now will only have a 5 minute minimum!

My new pricing structure is:

5 minutes = $25

10 minutes = $50

15 minutes = $75

20 minutes = $100

30 minutes = $150

45 minutes = $200

1 hour = $300

As always you can contact me regarding shows longer than 1 hour.

I hope that reducing my minimum will mean that no one will no longer be able to afford my time, however I know it’s inevitable that some won’t.  I’m sorry if we are no longer able to continue our professional relationship and I wish you the best. There are a lot of beautiful, talented girls that are within your price range I’m sure.

Remember: Camgirls are a luxury, not a right. 

Hope to play with you soon!

M.

Why I Blocked You

After writing about the importance of customer service for camgirls, it only seemed appropriate to write about customers and why you’ve been blocked. Here are the most common reasons:

You asked for a freebie/preview.  This should really go without saying, but if you ask me for something for free, or ask for a “preview” you will be blocked. I plan on writing another blog post for why I don’t do previews, but the short answer is this: I’m an established camgirl on multiple sites, if you need a preview you’re clueless or full of shit, neither of which I want to deal with. This can also include those who think they bought one show and want a “birthday freebie” etc.

You were disrespectful/tried to push my limits. Calling me slut, etc. or trying to talk to me like you’re a wannabe 8th grade rapper will result in a block. Asking me to watch you eat your shit or cut off your balls you’ll be blocked. Asking me to gape my ass you’ll be blocked. You get the idea.

You asked me to break the rules of a site. I don’t bite the hand that feeds. Asking me to take tribute shows on Niteflirt, take payment that is not CamModelDirectory will result in a block. How DARE you attempt to get me blocked/banned from a site because [insert bullshit reason here].

You didn’t respect my time. If you are a customer who continues to message me in between/after our shows with constant conversation, or a “pay pig” who talks about paying more but only ever buys shows occasionally, but continues to pester me on Skype to “arrange” such a show, you’ll be blocked. If you want to talk to me you can text me here. Otherwise, save the chit chat for our session. I may try to tell you to stop this behavior beforehand but if you don’t get the message I don’t want you clogging up my Skype for those who respect my time appropriately.

Why you buy a show, I give you my full, undivided attention for the time we have together, I owe you nothing else outside of that.

The Importance of Customer Service

This post is mainly directed at camgirls, however customers might also find it an interesting read.

As I’ve been doing more Skype shows I’ve had the pleasure of speaking to customers directly, many of which I acquired through my own marketing efforts. Because of this it has come to my attention that there is a serious issue when it comes to how we interact with our customers. Many men that I speak to are surprised that I’m actually nice to them… really. Why would they be surprised? It’s not just because I do a lot of fetish and femdom, because if anything vanilla guys tell me this more.

Why are they so astounded that I’m nice? Because the majority of you are not. Now, I don’t blame you. We have to deal with a lot everyday that civilians just don’t have to put up with. Beggars, rudeness, people seeing how much they can get for free just for fun (why people do this I don’t know)  constant attempts at manipulation, you name it. Yeah, I get it – it sucks. But do you know what sucks more? Approaching a sex worker with credit card in hand and a hard on, ready to really relax and enjoy some quality time with a lovely lady – only to get barked at and “fuck you pay me.” Maybe if you are into findom this is the appropriate response, but for the majority of customers this is not what they want to hear to get turned on.

There is a fine balance between asserting appropriate professional boundaries and being a total bitch because of a minority of people you’ve had negative experiences with. The vast majority of customers are not in this minority. I purposely choose to only interact with those who are polite, respectful gentlemen. I give a warning if they are not: shape up or you’re out. I will say this is part of the reason why I’m not submissive on cam. I’m actually a switch in my personal life, but online so many “dommes” are really just assholes and it isn’t worth my time to distinguish between the two. But… I digress.

You can still do femdom and have good customer service, you can still be submissive and not put up with crap. It is not limited to your niche. Remember that the person on the other end is just that, a person. They are a living, breathing, human being with thoughts and feelings. Many struggle with the idea of pay to play to begin with that to even approach someone is a difficult task. And on top of that you are rude to them? Stop it. Just stop it right now. Or don’t, your customers will come to me and be happy they did :)  (Just kidding… kind of).

It won’t always be easy. God knows I’m far from perfect. But I promise you it will be worth it. I know that the idea of giving some of your precious time to someone who might not spend money is not ideal, but you have to remember that you are a business providing a service. Vanilla businesses interact with their potential customers all the time, and so should you. You will learn soon enough how to spot a paying customer vs. someone trying to waste your time. It’s also not worth trying to “get back at” someone for freeloading or trying to scam you. Just ignore/block and move on.

You only have so much energy in a day. Spend it on those who earn it or have the potential to. It takes a lot more effort to be mean to someone then to be nice to them. It also ruins your mood so you can’t put on your best performance for those who deserve it.

Try it… I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the results.

M.

Why Pay to Play?

Because of the way camsites advertise, they often mislead the customer into thinking it’s some kind of dating site instead of pay to play. I understand that this is a way to get traffic, but it can be frustrating for both cam models and customers. One of the biggest frustrations is hearing someone say: “Why should I pay you? Why should I pay you when I can watch porn for free? Why should I pay you,  you should Skype with me for free.” Well, I’m going to address these each individually.

Why should I pay you?

Depends. Maybe you should or maybe you shouldn’t. There are reasons why you would want to pay a sex worker in general and specific reasons why you would want to pay a camgirl. I will be discussing both.

The biggest factor in determining this is opportunity cost. What is opportunity cost? For those of you who are not familiar with economics, opportunity cost is what you are losing by taking one option instead of the other. In the adult entertainment industry, the main cost for customers to consider is time, specifically what their time is worth.

A classic example is one is the typical “business man” customer of an escort – and more recently, camgirls. For those not in the hobby, it’s often surprising for others to find out that a good looking, successful man would chose to pay for the time of an attractive lady, perhaps one he could even date in real life.

Well, in order to find that girl, the business man would have to:

  • Spend hours looking for her. Bars, dating sites, etc.
  • Seduce her successfully, meaning there is a mutual attraction.
  • Spending hours going out to dinners/bars and potentially hundreds in expenses.

Time needed: Hours to weeks, depending.

Or:

  • Call a phone number/hop on a website.
  • Choose his provider.
  • Pay.

Time needed: 15 minutes to an hour.

Let’s say this business man is the owner of his own company, or a self employed. We can give his time a monetary value quite easily. For simplicity’s sake we’ll do $100/hour. Let us also say that it costs $300/hour for the escort or camgirls time (before the site’s cut). It becomes very clear that anything over 3 hours is a waste of the business man’s resources when he could be working instead to pay for services vs. pursuing what at first glance seems “free.” It is not free, as we now understand the real cost of chasing someone around in hopes that they like us.

Even if we ignore the fact that the business man could make more money in the time he would spend attempting to have sex or satisfy his fetish (say he doesn’t work weekends) he is still spending potentially hundreds of dollars and time at bars and fancy dinners, when he may have other hobbies or interests he wishes to spend his time on. He just wants what he wants, and then gets back to everyday life.

Now, that was an instance of where it makes sense for man to pay for adult services. Let’s look at a different scenario. You are a waiter who makes ~$20/hour including tips. It would take the waiter a lot of time to save up $300. Not only that, but he has a finite amount of time in which he can make money. He can only work 20/hrs week, his boss says. There is no way for him to get more hours. There is no way he can make more. It makes more sense for him to attempt to seduce a civilian than pay a sex worker, most of the time.

Overall, one must figure out what their time is worth and make rational economic decisions accordingly. Yeah, this can be hard when all the blood is in your little head instead of the big one – but try your best.

Why should I pay you when I can watch porn for free?

Porn is free, and it’s plentiful. Correct.

Sex workers are offering you real interaction. We are offering you our personalities, our experience, our professionalism. We are also offering you a gift, something we can never get back. We are giving you our time. Not only is our time (and yours) the most important thing in the world, but as we discussed in previous scenarios, it is not free. We are spending time with you when we could be spending time with our families. We are spending time with you when we could be working on our schoolwork. We are spending time with you while we could be sleeping. We are spending time with you when we could be making money doing something else or being with other customers.

Therefore if you want to watch porn, go for it. But what most take for granted is those performers, producers, and editors  that made that film are done now, they spent a day filming and that’s it – now you watch over and over again for a one time investment.  Live interaction is a completely different than pre-recorded content.

Time is money. Sex workers are a luxury on for those who can afford it.

Why should I pay you?  You should Skype with me for free. 

Honestly I laugh at loud at this crap. Why would I Skype with you for free when there are plenty who pay? If you think that I will because you’re hot/have a big dick/whatever – think again. I have many hot customers – model hot, to the point I get flustered – hot. I also have many who I genuinely enjoy their company and would consider to be friends, and they still pay because they respect my time. What can I say, I love my job :).

Also, once you do this long enough looks become less and less important. You realize that there are so many good looking people/big dicks in the world, a dime a dozen. The novelty of that initial attraction wears off. Not that looks aren’t important, but they aren’t the sole reason for becoming involved with someone anymore. Most of us become pickier, because we realize we can.

Why should I pay a camgirl? I can get an escort for the same price.

This entertains me too. I’m expensive for a camgirl (currently $9/min for exclusive on my main site) and have no problems getting men to pay me, and and I have regulars with long shows. I’m actually more expensive than some escorts. So obviously not all want to see a physical escort/domina if I’m still here!

A few reasons for this:

  • Some men with fetishes are shy, and are too scared to see a pro domme.
  • If a man is married and/or has a family with children, he can’t get away.
  • STD risk.
  • Law enforcement.
  • Privacy.
  • Convenience.

Conclusion:

This is all only if your goal is strictly to get off. Obviously seeing a sex worker doesn’t replace having a real relationship (hopefully). If looking for a meaningful connection, of course it’s worth it to spend tons of time looking for someone special. But for those who don’t “get it” I hope this has provided a new perspective for you to consider, and not be so quick to judge those that pay for sexual services.

M.

What’s the Obsession with Big Black Cock?

It has come to my attention that a lot of newbies to the fetish world, and specifically cuckolding don’t seem to understand the fascination – or shall I say obsession, with black men having sex with white women and the concept of big black cock. It is so prevalent in porn – the scene of the young blonde wife with the big black bull, so rampant to the point almost where it’s overdone. And a lot want to know… why?

There are certainly cuckolds that don’t want to see their partner with a black male, or are completely indifferent to it. Those who aren’t may wonder what is it exactly that makes all these people so obsessed with “BBC”? There’s been conflicting research on whether or not black males actually have larger penises, or if it’s just something that’s been perpetuated for so long it’s merely accepted as fact – that’s part of it, but doesn’t tell the whole story.

Let’s face it, it’s not just about dick size. Racism still exists, and a lot of it is so deeply ingrained in American culture that the stereotyping almost becomes unconscious. The idea of a “poor innocent white woman” getting plowed by a overbearing black bull is still very taboo. Anyone who thinks racism no longer exists is incredibly naïve. Even both cuckolds and bulls alike have been known to enjoy using the n-word during play at times. So it’s not just Caucasians who enjoy the taboo, it’s black bulls too. And it just so happens that the biggest taboos can be the biggest turn-ons.

Additionally, one of the factors that often gets overlooked in this niche is the aspect of competition. As a society we have developed in a way that men no longer compete for women the way they used to. We can’t overlook our own programming. Men are trained to hunt, to chase. They have it too easy now. Walk in a bar, buy a drink, get laid.  Or even worse – go on a dating or cam site and literally pick from a lineup of girls! This is not natural. It undermines the primal instincts that all men have, they crave it.

When a man becomes married or is in a long term committed relationship, there is no more chase (not that there was much to begin with most likely). They know their significant other is not going anywhere. What’s left? What is there to work towards? The funny thing is, a lot men will tell you all day long they want to get something the easiest way, the path of least resistance – but that is 100% not true. Whether or not they admit it to themselves, they love the competition, the thrill of the chase. Getting the prize is unsatisfactory otherwise. If someone just handed you a trophy would it mean anything to you? Of course not.

Now, what does this have to do with “big black cock”? The answer is for many, black men are seen to provide the biggest source of this competition. It’s easy for a white man to compete with another white man sexually, you’re essentially the same – where it counts anyway. But a white cuckold husband can never compete with a “mandingo”. He will never be black. It doesn’t matter what he does, if a woman likes black men he doesn’t stand a chance and there’s no changing that.

Overall, just like everything in kink reasons vary.  Yours aren’t the same as mine. Even if we like the same thing we may have dramatically different motivations and experiences – that’s what makes life great, isn’t it? :)

M.

Tips For Custom Video Customers

Lately I’ve been doing more custom fetish videos. It’s been an enjoyable experience for me. I love hearing all your ideas, fantasies, and dirty secrets ;) However sometimes the process doesn’t go as smoothly as it should. The main issue is almost always communication.

I prefer to get as much detail as possible when doing customs. Although I don’t necessarily like a script, giving as much info as you possibly can makes it much easier, and makes certain you are happy with the finished product.

Here are some questions to ask yourself (and to communicate to me) when ordering.  Now if none of these are important to you, then disregard. However if they are, make sure to include them!

– How do you want the feel of the video to be? Do you want it to be more sensual, more aggressive, harsh?

– A lot of eye contact, or more body shots?  In filming terms, how “tight” do you want the shots?

– What POV (point of view)? Looking down at you, traditional porn “point of view” style, voyeur style? Extreme close ups?

– Brighter lights, or dim, more romantic lighting? Do you want harsh, florescent lighting? (Such as for a medical scene).

– What do you want me to wear? Lingerie – what kind? If fully clothed for an office scene, do you want a few buttons open? ;)

-What do you NOT want to see. Hate red lipstick? Don’t like my glasses? Despise feet? Tell me!

These are just a few things to consider,  but there are many more.  Get creative! I look forward to hearing from you.

If you are interested in a custom video from me fill out my form here.

Skype Show Issues

I’m currently having issues with Skype dropping my calls.  I believe the issue is that I can’t use ethernet because the thunderbolt port on my Macbook Air is broke recently, and I don’t want to be without my computer for the 2 days to get it fixed, lol! I will soon so I can be back to doing Skype shows.  I think this issue is also exacerbated by the fact that my webcam is 1080p HD so it is “too high quality” for my computer + internet to handle without being hardwired. Since I can’t change the settings on it like I’d be able to on a PC, I instead purchased a 720p webcam to see if that would help. We will see.

Any tech nerds out there – send me a message if you can help!

I will still be available on Streamate as always but for now Niteflirt will be phone sex only. I also do DirectIM on Adultwork as well.

See you gentlemen soon ;)

M.